Will Women Legitimise Erotic Massage?
Will it be women that drive society to accept sensual massage as a legitimate therapy?
Sensual and Erotic Massage has been around for thousands of years and for much of that time seen as healthy, pleasurable and quite normal. From the Ancient Greeks to India and then the Romans, naked massage was the norm. It all changed when the newer religions appeared and arousal of any sort came to be regarded as sexual and and carnalistic and only to be experienced conditionally.
And so it has been for the last 1500 years that any sensual or arousing encounter experienced outside of relationship has been seen as unacceptable. However in the last 30 years sensual massage has become popular again, particularly with men and many men now seek this as a way to de stress or to receive caring intimate attention, but if we are to see a mind shift by society it will probably be women that finally help change societies attitude to sensual massage.
Increasingly over the past 5 years more and more women are discovering that they too can enjoy a moment in time that is intimate, expressive, caring sensual and erotic and the go back to their day to day lives feeling un-judged or any guilt.
Below is an article written by Master Masseur Colin Richards who has been giving sensual massage to for 10 years and to women for 5 years.
I have been giving sensual massage to women for six years and in that time have treated women of all ages, nationalities, ethnicities, body types and size. Some of the women I see are happily single, some are reluctantly single, many are partnered in loving yet sexually unfulfilling relationships. Others are in relationships where the sex has become just functional, some are in good relationships but want more, sexually. In all cases when booking the appointment they express a desire to enjoy a level of sensual and erotic satisfaction that they feel is currently missing from their lives.
So, it is no surprise that after taking their first sensual massage most of my female clients say that as well as being very pleasurable, it has also helped them to re ignite a sexuality that they felt they had lost touch with. Or that the massage has enabled them to discover a sexuality that they have been yearning to find but as yet not been with a partner who was able to help them discover it.
Growth & popularity of sensual massage
The growth and popularity of sensual massage has mostly been been driven by men as it is widely accepted that it is men that seek sex as a means to satisfy sexual drive and physical intimacy that may be missing from their personal lives. However it was not until the late 1980’s when tantric massage slipped oilily on to the westerners menu, did an alternative to paid for sex become available. As the word tantric crept in to the language so the many men who previously had avoided the mechanical world of sex services but who desperately wanted to feel sensuality and intimacy of erotic touch, began to explore the caring sensual touch of a tantric masseur.
Then around 2005 and emerging from the tantric world came the option of sensual massage. Sensual massage offered a similar caring erotic experience but took a more humanistic approach to arousal and rather than overlaying the massage with spiritual ceremony the sensual masseur focused more on the bodies natural desire for intimate touch and arousal. By incorporating traditional massage techniques with sensual arousal it gave the receiver an all round experience that was at the same time relaxing and therapeutic but also stimulating and erotic and unlike the tantric massage it generally included the orgasm as a natural crescendo to the massage.
With more and more people now seeking this authentic approach to massage, there has been a considerable increase in masseurs offering sensual massage, many of them trained in the traditional techniques but then adding the sensual aspects to their massage routine.
So it is my hope that soon sensual massage will soon no longer be regarded by society as a sexual service (according to UK legal terminology any contact that causes arousal whilst not illegal is termed a sexual service) but be accepted as a legitimate health treatment that relaxes our body, improves our sense of well being and often improves our relationships and sexual performance with partners and loved ones.
However I believe that if this acceptance it to happen will not driven by men but that it will be women who change the perception and encourage the sceptics to accept sensual massage as a bono fide treatment , since it is women whom are increasingly seeking out sensual massage not because they are sexually needy men but because many know that if their bodies are not sexually satisfied they suffer physiologically, emotionally and even in their health.
In Victorian times thousands of women were diagnosed with a mental disorder known as Hysteria. One of the diagnosis of Hysteria was for a women to have an “overt desire or need for sexual arousal” and the treatment to remedy this “ghastly mental disorder” was either masturbation by hand from a doctor or worse still, the removal of the woman’s ovaries.
Thankfully attitudes have changed and western society in particular does not view female sexuality in this way any more. However this acknowledgement of female sexuality is not because woman’s desire for sexual fulfilment has changed, it is because most societies understand better that female sexual energy is a strong natural force and that the freedom to express it is an essential part of being female.
Sensual massage is even more relevant for women
But there is a catch. As enlightened as society maybe, are women really any better off than they were 150 years ago? Certainly women can talk about and explore their sexuality easier now, magazines are abound with information of better orgasms or sexual techniques and look at the phenomenon of the book 50 ‘Shades of Grey’ and its BDSM story line that 80,000 female readers found fascinating. But it still seems that if a woman admits to enjoying sexual expression and that wants more or something different than she is getting currently in her life, unlike men she still has limited options where to find it.
She could slip into a relationship that is fundamentally not right for her but that at least is sexual or she could seek out casual sexual encounters via internet sites or sex apps with anonymous partners whom she knows very little about and risking not only her reputation, her health but also her safety. She could, with her partner explore the world of swinging or sex parties where the sex can be more about erotic entertainment than sensual intimacy or of course she could take a lover or a toy boy to play with or simply expand her sex toy library and use masturbation as a regular release.
But Sensual Massage gives women another and i think much more appealing choice as to how to enjoy her sexuality. A place where she can be private, non judged, and the centre of attention to be able to explore her sexuality in what ever way she likes giving her a safer and as most women say much more fulfilling meaningful experience and as more and more women try sensual massage the more encouraged society will be to view it not as a sex service but as a quite normal pleasurable therapy.
Written by Master Masseur Colin
Below are some of the reasons female clients have given for wanting to explore a sensual/erotic massage.
- I enjoy regular massage, to have my muscles worked professionally but I also want to experience intimate touch so that I can connect with the deeper primal sensual part of myself
- I want to experience a sensual massage in “50 Shades of Grey” manner where the masseur is in complete control and I can just lay back and enjoy his authority with the knowledge that I am ultimately in control of all that takes place. (This style does not include any BDSM or role play but incorporates assertive massage and some physical body lifting as well as strong arousal techniques. (this style of massage can only be given to those with average to slim physiques)
- I like to enjoy the firm yet tender touch of a man without the need to perform or give back sexually
- I enjoy receiving arousal and ultimate orgasm through gentle prolonged intimate touch rather than penetrative intercourse
- I have a loss of libido
- I have a fear of intimacy and am embarrassed about my body but stiil want to enjoy sensual arousal
- I experience painful intercourse, orgasmic dysfunction
- I am insecure and sexual inexperienced and want to learn more about my sexuality as well as how to give excellent sensual arousal to my partners
- I am a single women, who is happy to not be in a relationship and although my sex life is good I miss the intimacy and tender touch that a relationship brings.
- I believe that it is right to be able to experience arousal and orgasm without commitment and responsibilities of a relationship.
- I want to explore orgasm as I have heard that there are multiple ways a female can achieve this.
- I am in a marriage/ partnership where most else is good but the sex and intimacy has declined and I need to receive intimate attention within a safe professional therapeutic environment that is discreet and private that will not challenge my current situation